9 DREADFUL DRINKS YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY NOT BE DOWNING NOW THAT YOU’RE 30

There reaches a point in some people's lives when they look back at the things they used to do and think, "What in the hell was I doing?" Of course, that doesn't happen to everyone. But in terms of the dreadful drinks below, it should. 

Disclaimer: We're biased since we're a Craft Gin Club that appreciates the variety and quality of well-made spirits as well as the stories of the distillers that make them. We're also over 30. So keep at it, kids. You'll get over your cheap booze someday soon!


JAGER BOMBS
Dropping a shot of a syrupy digestif into a pint of beer and chugging the mixture. Sounds delicious, doesn’t it? Actually, it didn’t even sound good when we were 20. It just got us shitfaced quickly.

jagermeister

MAD DOG 20/20
If you’re big on a load of sugar mixed with artificial flavours and colourings tossed into something that doesn’t even vaguely resemble wine but which has somehow been deemed sufficient enough to carry that label, then go nuts. But we’re hoping you’ve grown out of that.

MD 20/20

ALCOPOPS
The whole purpose of these barely quaffable fake-flavour bombs is to market them to teenagers, which is about the age we hope you last bought one.

Alcopops

BODY SHOTS
Shooting straight, cheap spirits from a stranger’s lint-filled navel. Sounds delicious!

body shots

PINTS OF SNAKEBITE
With all of the lovely microbrews and quality ciders popping up around the UK, if you’re drinking a Snakebite you know you’re not drinking for taste any more. You may as well just slam a Jager Bomb since you’re obviously looking to get pissed.

snakebite

GOLDFISH BOWLS
Throw a bunch of booze in a big bowl, mix it with some artificially flavoured sugar water and communally suck it through straws with your mates. Good times, great taste… if the only thing you’ve ever drank is alcopops.

Goldfish

JELLY SHOTS
Tablet jelly and cheap vodka in shot form. It sounds like a baby food for those just getting over puberty.

Jelly shots

ANYTHING AT SCREAMPUBS
“Student-oriented pub chain.” Need we say more?

student's 25% off

INSANE AMOUNTS OF BAD BOOZE!
Our advice: Stay calm and sip craft spirits.

tequila